Everybody here’s been to Dallas, right? Spent a week there one day, or somethin’?

What they say is “everything’s bigger in Texas,” but that ain’t true. It ain’t true because what they don’t have that’s big is bodies of water. They’ll talk about the Rio Grande, but it’s more like the Rio Bitty – one reason that we have the border problems we’ve got is that’s more like a crick or a baby bayou than an actual river. If it was more like the Mississippi, or even the Red or the Atchafalaya, the Mexicans would have to stay on their side a lil’ more often.

And that goes double for some of their other rivers, like the Brazos and the Trinity. They might have some length to ’em, but as rivers go we got a lot bigger than that in Louisiana.

Except for right now. For a short, fleetin’ little time they really can say that everything’s bigger in Texas.

Here’s what the Trinity River looks like in Dallas when it’s embiggened by lotsa rain…

And from the chopper…

See, here’s the thing – in Louisiana, our rivers look like that all the time. We don’t need a big rainstorm to make ’em that way.

Oh – almost forgot the theme music for this post…