Five Things About Dem Saints

They’re 0-3, y’know.

THING ONE: Marcus Colston was pretty much done last year. Guy’s been beaten up so many times for so long goin’ over the middle and gettin’ blowed up by defensive backs and he’s had to recuperate from so many injuries that he just don’t have it – and it was pretty clear a year ago it was time to start movin’ toward somebody else as the go-to guy on third down.

So what did they do? They traded Jimmy Graham, who was the only other big receiver they had, and made Colston an even bigger piece of the offense this year.

Smart. Colston only dropped three passes on the last drive where the Saints were tryin’ to go down the field an’ score. You can call him Dropston now (Hat tip to Mike Bayham, who’s now an honorary nutria for that one).

They have Brandin Cooks, who’s really good but can’t do it alone, Brandon Coleman, who looks like Tarzan and plays like Jane, and Willie Snead, who’s not terrible but needs to be a 4th receiver. Colston is done, and this needs to be his last year if he even finishes the season. The waiver wire is the best friend the Saints have right now, because they went into the season without much of a wide receiver corps (and they don’t have a quality first-string tight end, either).

Personnel management is why you’re 0-3.

THING TWO: Rob Ryan, when he gets fired this time – and it’s gonna happen before the season’s over, you can hang paper on that one – ain’t gonna snort and say he’ll be out of work for like two weeks. He’ll be out of work for a good while if he expects to be an NFL defensive coordinator. It’s too easy to fool Rob Ryan. Carolina did it pretty much all day after their first drive.

They can’t get a pass rush without blitzing, I get that. But you can’t blitz an NFL quarterback without disguising a blitz. They see it comin’, they’re gonna pick it apart easy. That’s what NFL quarterbacks do for a livin’, y’know.

And Rob Ryan hasn’t disguised a blitz in his life.

The sooner they let Dennis Allen do what they hired him to do, the sooner this team might actually win a game. Not that we ought to want that; what we want is the first pick.

THING THREE: You spend a fortune on C.J. Spiller so he can catch one good pass a game. Meantime Marcus Murphy, your 7th round draft pick, does everything Spiller can do and is not hurt all the time.

Smart.

THING FOUR: The first-round pick was an offensive tackle. And he can’t beat out Sack Strief, who got your $20 million quarterback kilt last week – plus can’t move Carolina’s defensive end off the ball so you got no running game.

You also got no running game because you actually gave the left guard job to Tim Lelito, who couldn’t beat out Jimmy Goodwin for the center job last year.

Meaning you traded Jimmy Graham away for Max Unger and spent your first pick on the offensive line and you have as many holes on the offensive line as you did last year. But you don’t have Jimmy Graham and you spent a first round pick that coulda been used on one of the six other places you got problems.

By the way, does Jairus Byrd actually exist? He’s more like a rumor than an NFL player, except for the big paycheck somebody is cashin’ on his behalf.

THING FIVE: Yeah, we want the first pick in the draft. Problem is, who makes the pick? You can’t let Mickey Loomis do that; he built this freakin’ dumpster fire in the first place.

But who gets rid of Loomis after this year? In other words, who runs this team? Is it Tom Benson? That’s kinda shaky, ain’t it?

That’s a way of sayin’ this mess ain’t gonna get any better. How did New Orleans go from rockin’ and rollin’ to a disaster that even affects the football team so fast?

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