If not, feast your eyes – this is your brain on drugs…
This guy is a business major at Ole Miss. What kind of business? Nunya!
Momma is so proud.
They say the dope he’s on is something called “gravel,” the real name of which is alpha-Pyrrolidinopentiophenone. It’s the active ingredient in that bath salts stuff they beg people not to take because it turns you into this guy.
You might get as unruly as Daniel Stewart Berry by just tryin’ to pronounce alpha-Pyrrolidinopentiophenone. Tryin’ to pronounce it while bein’ high on alpha-Pyrrolidinopentiophenone would be, well…you head-butt a sheriff’s deputy on your way to court and you get a busted nose for your trouble.
Which didn’t happen while they were draggin’ him back to his cell, by the way. Naw. He busted his nose when he head-butted the deputy. Swear.
This crap this doofus took supposedly causes hyperstimulation, paranoia, and hallucinations. And head-butting. Along with stolen Funyons from the country store.
We’d say this was a black eye for Ole Miss, but come on. It’s Ole Miss, by damn. Maybe it’s more like a busted nose for Ole Miss.