I’m not a fan of the demon rum.

It makes for hangovers. Snot-knockin’, hate-your-life hangovers.

Then again, if drinkin’ rum made for nights like this, I’d have some.

Why didn’t we let booze companies advertise on TV back in the day, again? They make better commercials than douche companies or tax attorneys or car insurance with that crazy broad in ’em.

They don’t have any drop-dead, red-hot Keira Knightley-type chicks in douche commercials or tax attorney commercials. But in rum commercials you pretty much gotta have ’em.

It’s a demon, though. You’ll feel like hell in the mornin’.