SARGE: Gamecocks

When I was a kid I was chased by a particularly cantankerous rooster with a heavy desire to peck my eyeballs out. I think I was three when it happened. It scared the bejesus out of me and I think scarred me for life. He wasn’t even a Gamecock (as they’re known to be called); he was a just a nasty old bird with an attitude about little kids trying to see what chickens did in the henhouse. Since then I’ve particularly relished chicken recipes and believe the Kentucky Colonel had the right idea about how chicken should be dealt with. PETA can kiss my fricassee where it comes down to a chicken’s rights.

This Syrian debate is no more than a distraction being flung around like chicken droppings from a dyspeptic rooster. Obama and his chicken-scratching cohorts, Kerry, McCain and Graham, have switched from the principles of the Marquess of Queensbury’s rules in relation to combat. They’ve strapped on their spurs, strutted into the ring and are acting like their political testosterone levels were questioned. They must prove themselves as potent and relevant as they ever were.

The old rooster (McCain, no longer capable of flight with the eagles) dodders forward like an unguided missile slamming into each new issue while trying to reestablish the woebegone idea he has relevance in any of this. McCain’s trying to define his stance on issues he can’t remember. He just knows he’s supposed to say something. He’ll contradict it later (if he can remember it.)

Kerry, most recently elevated to Rooster Second Class (after the old Hen Hillary departed the ring) is trying mightily to appear resolute and commanding. He stands his ground like the warrior he isn’t and allows McCain to stumble around the ring like a juggernaut barreling into and out of each confused statement he makes. Kerry, as a Gamecock, has delusions of sufficiency.

Linseed Graham, a particularly self-serving old rooster known for his lubricity and ability to shed principles like bad feathers being molted out of season, is strutting around the perimeter of the ring and making vapid statements with no pertinence to the matter at hand. But, he knows he must say something. Graham’s there to act as a seeing-eye chicken pointing McCain in the direction of the audience so he can blather inanely concerning the issue.

Kerry, as petulant and duplicitous as ever, has shown his “command presence” by deepening his stentorian rumble and witless rhetoric. He’s etched his war record into the annals of history with a watercolor marker, so he can change the truth as he sees fit whenever necessary. He’s the only presidential candidate in history to have his war record controverted by his peers. Seeing him act as a hawk (while he’s really a flaccid Gamecock) would be funny if it wasn’t for the danger it holds for American diplomatic credibility represented by a non-credible and limp foreign policy such as Obama’s.

This drama is being acted out before the Congress. These are specially bred birds, conditioned by education and in-breeding among the progressive elite. These Gamecocks are incredibly aggressive when in the presence of anybody challenging their self-possession and authority. Gamecocks give themselves the best of care until they age in the job to a point of self-sufficiency.

Cockfighting is a blood sport. There can be severe trauma to any cocks of lesser combat experience. While not all fights are to the death, some old cocks like McCain survive only because they have more scar tissue than live tissue to injure. He works off of an obsolete auto-pilot salvaged from a reputation of questionable quality. Advocates of Cockfighting as an “age old sport” list almost religious reasons for the perpetuation of cockfighting as a sport. The resuscitation of people like McCain is seen as an act of divine intervention rising to the level of the Resurrection of Lazarus.

This is all offered in the sense of Bread and Circuses; a superficial means of appeasing the people in the case of major political issues. These old Gamecocks seek to create public approval, not through exemplary public policy, but more through diversion, distraction, or the mere satisfaction of the immediate, shallow requirements of a selectively uninformed populace. They preach before a tone-deaf choir.

So, here we are appreciating old, doddering, impotent gamecocks strutting their flaccid stuff and trying to justify sending American resources into the Syrian civil war we have no business interfering in.

When I watch this I’m reminded of how much I appreciate those eleven secret herbs and spices the old colonel touted.

Some of these guys need to be marinated in them before they cause any more damage.

Thanks for listening.

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