“I’m not going to send federal troops into Louisiana to arrest people for whatever you do down there, smoking crayfish. Want me to ban that and send federal troops down there? I bet maybe smoking crayfish ain’t good for you. What if it’s fried? Might clog your arteries, huh?”

– Idiot Colorado congressman Jared Polis, a Democrat, to Rep. John Fleming (R-Louisiana) during a debate over marijuana legalization.