LSU’s Gonna Win On Friday

Know how I know?

I’ll tell you.

I watched this. And I’m pretty sure Miles showed it to his team, too.

If you play for LSU and you see this you’re gonna be permanently jacked up. Can’t lose.

Tickets for this thing are going for almost $1000 on some of those scalpin’ sites. It’s gonna be a legendary atmosphere.

In 2003 LSU had a game like this against Arkansas. Win and it’s a trip to Atlanta, win there and it’s a good chance at a national title shot. The Tigers bombed ’em, 55-24.

This Arkansas team is better than the one they had in 2003. We know that. But it doesn’t matter. LSU’s SIXTH defensive back is the SEC Player of the Week this week.

The SIXTH guy. He plays in the dime defense. And he’s the Player of the Week. Not only that – it’s the SECOND TIME he’s been the SEC Player of the Week.

And Arkansas is a passing team who counts on the other team’s DB’s not being able to cover their guys.

Know what else? Arkansas has played four games away from home this year. They went to Dallas and had to have Texas A&M collapse late or else they’d have lost. They went to Tuscaloosa and got blowed up. They went to Ole Miss and were getting clobbered until midway through the third quarter when the Black Bears decided to go hibernate. And they went to Vanderbilt and woulda lost but for the little keecker getting a case of the shanks and gorkin’ an easy field goal with the game in the lurch.

Better to be lucky than good? Sure. But they ain’t been good on the road. And you don’t beat LSU unless you’re good. Damn good, in fact.

What’s happened in Baton Rouge this year?

  • Northwestern State came in and got a 49-3 massage.
  • Kentucky took a 35-7 beating. It was the fourth quarter before they completed a pass, or close to it, if I remember right.
  • Florida was No. 17 at the time, and the 41-11 reaming they got will be best remembered for the fact that LSU’s punter wasted a 50-yard touchdown by taunting their defensive backs at the six on his way in. Swagger.
  • Auburn was No. 19. The final was 45-10 and it coulda been a whole lot worse.
  • Western Kentucky came in and caught a sleepwalkin’ LSU team who only beat ’em 42-9.

That’s what’s happened to LSU’s opponents in Baton Rouge.

Sure, Arkansas is better than the lot. I get that. They also don’t match up so hot with LSU.

Arkansas gives up 164 yards a game on the ground. They also give up 4.3 yards a carry. That’s a lot. And against the decent running backs they’ve played it’s been ugly.

  • Trent Richardson had 126 yards on 17 carries when Alabama smacked ’em around.
  • Christine Michael from Texas A&M had 230 yards on 32 carries. Cyrus Gray had another 95 yards on 17 carries.
  • Auburn’s Michael Dyer had 112 yards on 21 carries, while Onterio McCalebb had 91 yards on just 13 carries, in a game Arkansas won easily.
  • Zac Stacy had 128  yards on 19 carries for Vanderbilt in a game Arkansas shoulda lost.

Sure, they did a decent job on Brandon Bolden from Ole Miss and Vic Ballard from Mississippi State. Those guys aren’t in the same class as the guys mentioned above, I wouldn’t say. Maybe Ballard is, but he’s useless when he has to play in whatever that offense was Dan Mullen put on the field last week. That was ridiculous; it looked like it was designed so that Mullen could convince the folks back in Starkville that Brett Favre’s nephew really can’t play. I dunno.

What I do know is that you’d better be able to stuff the run if you wanna beat LSU. Because LSU’s runnin’ game would punch holes in the Steel Curtain on a good day.

Arkansas stinks against the run.

Their best chance is to jump out ahead of LSU and force Miles to let his quarterbacks throw the ball. That could be LSU’s weakness. But it’s a hell of a lot easier said than done, getting ahead of this team. Nobody’s done that this year.

Sure, something crazy could happen and Arkansas might come in here and get a win. Is that likely? I don’t think so.

I think we’re gonna see some legendary stuff out there.

I think Marcellus Wallace had this one right.

We’re gonna get medieval on yo’ ass.

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