Bloviating

This piece is written with my tongue firmly planted in my cheek.

Cheekiness has been a major component of my literary existence since I got my first box of eight massive Crayola crayons in kindergarten when I scribbled my first words: eschew obfuscation!

It requires you read through to the end and try desperately to not let your organs detecting light and converting it into electro-chemical impulses in neurons fatigue too desperately.

President Warren G. Harding described “Bloviating” as “the art of speaking for as long as the occasion warrants, and saying nothing”. H.L. Mencken, American journalist, essayist, editor, satirist and critic took Harding’s middle name and called Harding’s oratory; “gamalielese”. Bloviating and “gamalielese” are trademarks of modern American politicians.

It’s most prominently being witnessed from the ranks of both parties’ more entrenched members. Beaurat Obama has been hawking “Hope and Change” with NO indication of just how he hopes to change anything for so long we can’t do anything other than hope he changes his employment and updates it to “unemployed”.

Senior Senators and Representatives become enamored of the “word du jour”, a particular verbiage they find to be novel and attention getting.

Sometimes it’s obvious they only speak the words because some wordsmith sitting in the background hammered a keyboard long enough to slam the letters together like the room full of fabled monkeys writing War and Peace.

But, in order to assure nobody thinks I’m picking on Beaurat, (I am, but wish to camouflage my nefarious intent with a sparkling example of the offensive rigging of vernacular prestidigitation guaranteed to cause those same ocular organs and luminescence aggregators to develop a glaze-over with a veneer of disconcerting opacity dimming your understanding of my entreaty to gain clarity, elucidation and explication.)

I must also address great opprobrium toward the loyal opposition seeking to dethrone the present resident perched on his toilet once known as the presidency. Willard “Mitt” Romney has been the victim of his campaign machinery’s inability to home in on the more salient, demonstrably interesting and important issues needing address.

Romney’s people have been assiduously attempting to show the depth of shadow removing their candidate from any attempt to show similarity between the two. In simple fact and a realization of the tension present in the actuality of the candidates’ diversity of approach as it applies to problem solving on a scale few could appreciate, it must be seen the two of them are too terribly alike for America’s good.

They debate whether Obamacare is, or isn’t a tax. Who cares! It’s badly written law! Romney’s people are trying like heck to show he’s a man of the people. Millionaires are people. They’re not MY people, but they’re people.

Neither candidate has recently been in the crowd occupying one thing or another. Neither has ever been without a job. Neither has been evicted from a foreclosed upon home and property and neither one of them has seen their children do without while frantically trying to balance a bad budget short-fall with NO leverage available.

So just what makes them think they can equate to you, the average citizen scratching to break-even? The answer is simple: Bloviating. Together, and separately, these two will say much carrying no more clarity than the first five paragraphs of this column.

Though they claim to have answers, they merely have ideas. Some are tried and true under the circumstances noted and faced by prior administrations. But, because it worked a hundred years ago doesn’t mean it’ll work today. Other “answers” pushed as fact are no more than theories retro-babbled by hyper-educated morons malnourished in the sense of never having to make it work in the real world.

Beaurat and “Mitt” are saying a lot, and “speaking for as long as the occasion warrants, and saying nothing”. It’s the stock and trade of politicians to seek to uplift society by placing themselves above the audience they want to impress.

That’s what they claim. It’s more obvious they want to be revered as glorious leaders, not the buffoons stuck in neutral as they are.

Watch the bloviating. See if it smells like manure.

Thanks for Listening,
Sarge



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