Y’know that old line about how you can really judge who somebody is by who their enemies are?
If that line’s true, Sarah Palin is drop-dead awesome.
I say that because Sarah Palin’s enemies are some of the dumbest people on earth. She’s pretty much a magnet for attacks from people who have a big problem figurin’ out how to breathe.
And from people who write books about figurin’ out how to breathe.
Take Terry McMillan, for example. She’s the one who wrote that Waiting To Exhale book they made that excruciatin’ chick flick out of.
Miz McMillan’s done some other stuff, too. For example, they’re about to make a movie out of the sequel to the breathing-problems book; it’s called Getting To Happy.
And one imagines that, since Oprah and Jamie Foxx have figured it out, when you’re involved with a Hollywood project you gotta spit out a buncha lefty bile for to make you look good with the Hollywood swells and thus gin up box office among all the cool people. That you piss off half your potential audience in the process…they haven’t figgered that part out yet.
Anyhoo, this is what Miz Terry went with…
This ain’t anything new, y’all. Miz Terry – who’s rich – rips the rich, and calls Mitt Romney a ‘sociopath.’ And she’ll do the whole ‘Republicans behave like Hitler‘ thing for ya if you look at her Twitter feed long enough.
But if you look at her Twitter feed long enough, what you’re gonna come to is the conclusion she’s really, really dopey.
As in, she’s an idiot. A real, live idiot. And I can prove that.
Another one of Miz McMillan’s books that they made a movie off of was How Stella Got Her Groove Back, which is about a cougar who hooks up with a really pretty black man. It’s a novel, but it’s more of a diary. Because Miz McMillan was the cougar, and the really pretty black man turned out to be her husband (kinda), a dude named Johnathan Plummer. She was 40-somethin’, he was 20-somethin’.
And six years later or so, it turns out this Plummer cat – who in real life is a bit like Taye Diggs’ character in the movie, in that the cougar meets him in Jamaica and he’s from there, and he leaves out of there to go hang with her and get married and so forth – is gay.
Like, really gay.
So what happens is this public train wreck of a divorce, where they’re sellin’ popcorn and cotton candy outside the courthouse and so on. A taste…
But now McMillan’s fairytale romance has come crashing down around her in a way the author never imagined. In December, Plummer revealed he is gay, and in January McMillan filed for divorce.
“It was devastating to discover that a relationship I had publicized to the world as life-affirming and built on mutual love was actually based on deceit,” McMillan says in court papers. “I was humiliated.”
McMillan is claiming Plummer knew about his sexuality and intentionally deceived her for money and American citizenship. Plummer says he did not know that he was gay at the time he married McMillan and is seeking spousal support and the voiding of the prenuptial agreement that waves his right to that support.
Plummer told his story exclusively to “GMA.”
“I married her [McMillan] because I truly loved her,” Plummer said, adding he was not aware of McMillan’s fame when the couple met.
“Authors aren’t celebrated in Jamaica as they are here,” Plummer said. “… I didn’t initiate anything. She’s the one that spoke to me.
“I was having breakfast and [she] just … asked me, ‘Are you a rapper?’ Just like in the movie, ‘Stella,’ exactly. Everything happened that way.”
In “Stella,” McMillan writes of the character based around Plummer, “He is looking at me so innocently, I accept the fact that this isn’t some kind of come-on … Sincerity is written all over [his] face.”
Looking back, Plummer says that confusion was also part of his expression.
“I was naïve,” Plummer said. “I didn’t know who I was and she asked me to leave my job, family and friends to live with her. We fell in love with one another. But in the past 2½ years, I realized there was something wrong here. I didn’t have an inkling before.”
McMillan tells a different story.
“I believe that Jonathan has always known that he is gay,” she said in her court declaration. “By his own declaration, Jonathan repeatedly admits to being aware of his sexual orientation before we were married. Specifically, he admits that he ‘had been experiencing conflicted feelings about my sexuality for some time …’ and that he had suppressed his feelings for 28 years.”
Plummer says he was faithful to McMillan for all 6½ years of their marriage, and although he registered on a gay dating Web site, it was just to look. He said McMillan has harassed him since he came out about his sexuality.
“She’s came at my job numerous times, unannounced, yelling at me in front of clients,” Plummer said. “And she’s calling myself and my lawyer low-life scums.”
“Ms. McMillan … deeply regrets the fact that Mr. Plummer continues to attempt to exploit this situation for his own personal gain,” said Judy Smith, a spokeswoman for McMillan. “If Mr. Plummer truly wanted to resolve this matter he would not be behaving in this manner …”
You get the picture.
Hey, you wanna see dignified? Here’s what happens when the fruit and the fruitcake both go on Oprah to talk about all this…
My uncle T-Claude would call that a s**t show.
But wait, there’s more. Here’s your boy Plummer after that Oprah appearance…
It musta been a huge shock when that dude came out of the closet, right? Like, who knew? Flaming gay guy turns out to be gay?
Meantime Terry McMillan retreats to Twitter, where she sorts out the wreckage of her personal life by yappin’ at Mitt Romney and Sarah Palin.
You impressed yet?
I’m gonna say that if Miz McMillan were to get her wish an’ take a poke at Palin, she’d prolly regret the hell out of it when Sarah Barracuda got to poke back.