It’s Time For Eddie Lambert To Do Something Other Than Be In The Legislature

Here’s the dumbest bill of this year’s legislative session – or any other session.

We present to you Rep. Lambert’s soon-to-be-infamous HB 438

hb 438

In Lambert’s Mudbug Utopia, it shall be illegal to sell half-pint crustaceans in amounts exceeding five percent of a sack.

And here’s what happens to you if you get caught selling small crawfish in measures and percentages Lambert the Lawgiver proscribes…

The first offense of the law would come with a fine of between $100 and $350 along with possible jail time of up to 60 days, the bill says. The fine increases to between $300 and $550 for the second offense and between $500 and $750 for third and subsequent offenses. Meanwhile, possible jail terms would be between 30 and 60 days for the second offense and between 60 and 90 days for the third and subsequent offenses.

One hopes this legendarily stupid piece of legislation isn’t just killed immediately, but that it gets a long committee hearing during which its author is verbally abused and made an object of fun and derision for cluttering the calender with such claptrap.

Eddie Lambert is a Republican, by the way. To say that he urinates on the party’s brand would be charitable. He’s one of the smaller mudbugs in the sack.

And the word is he’ll be running for Sen. Jody Amedee’s seat this fall. We’re not sure who will run against him; hopefully someone who doesn’t think it’s necessary to make selling 5.1 percent of a crawfish sack containing mudbugs 3.4 inches long a crime in state law carrying as much as 60 days in jail.

That’s not a particularly high bar to clear, but we’d regard it as important to do so. Louisiana has a $1.6 billion budget deficit and this imbecile is bringing bills about the size of crawfish.

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